We enter the room with my mum and dad leading, me behind and Alice with Aaron holding her hand. Mum and dad greet Doctor Whittaker in a very adult way, shaking her hands and introducing themselves while I make sure Aaron and Alice are comfortable on the sofa and I sit in next to Aaron as it seems he wants to hold my hand. We sit on the sofa and try and to make eye contact as we are all very anxious.  After the adults introduce themselves, mum and dad come and sit on the other sofa on our side of the room and Doctor Whittaker takes her seat on the single chair across from us, crosses her legs and picks up her note pad and starts scribbling away. After a few moments of her scribbling away she makes eye contact with us and introduces herself to Aaron and Alice.

“hello, Aaron and Alice, it’s nice to meet you properly. I heard a lot about you the other day from Anna, I hear you’re into dress up and football Aaron?’ She looks over and he nods his head, ‘And I hear you love Disney, have some Guinea pigs your share with Anna, is that right?”

“Yeah, mines called Moana and Anna called hers Luna after Luna Lovegood.” She replies very quietly.

“I love that, I  have a dog called Pongo and no he isn’t a dalmatian, he is actually a german shepherd. Now I want you two to relax this isn’t about you as much it’s  just about me getting to know Anna’s family as mental health is not just trauma for the patient but the family as well, so I want you to know that if you and Aaron are finding this confusing or you are worried about anything that is a safe space for you to address those worries and ask questions.” She pauses and takes a breath. “First things first, I want to talk to just your parents and Anna so why don’t you two head over to the drawing table and bean bags and draw me a picture of your family and once you’re done there is some colouring pages for you two,is that okay?” That puts a smile on Aaron’s face in particular as he loves drawing and colouring. They head over to the bean bags and Alice sorts some paper and crayons out for Aaron and then her and they get scribbling away.

“I always find art therapy to be a very positive way of the younger children telling me their true feelings without them knowing as sometimes they struggle to verbalise feelings. Anyway, while the younger two are busy, let’s discuss some of the reasons this all started. Anna tells me earlier this week you announced to the children about your divorce. Would you care to share about how the divorce came about as I got the feeling from our session yesterday that Anna feels it is her fault.” She speaks in a very professional way. When she says about how I feel it’s my fault I look over to my siblings as I try very hard to avoid eye contact with my parents, specifically my dad. I watch them in the corner of my eye and my dad shifts in his seat unsure what to say, my mum however hides a tear and wipes it away. After gathering herself she walks over and sits near me and holds my hand and I turn to look at her.

“This is not in anyway your fault, it’s me and your dad’s fault we just aren’t working anymore as a couple. But please never think this your fault, you kids are the reason we tried so hard to make it work, but no matter what we tried it wasn’t working with your dad anymore, but no matter what happens we will still always be your parents and still love you kids more than anything.”

“I understand mum, I just don’t want you and dad to split up, would you maybe be willing to do couples counselling or something? Just for me?”

“Sure sweet heart we will give it go, right Steve?” She looks over to my dad who hesitantly agrees. “on one condition, you will stop blaming yourself for our divorce and work hard in therapy to get better and come home?”

“Sure mum, I will try really hard in therapy. I am determined I have to be out for the winter formal anyway. Isabella has already come up with some designs for our dresses, me Izzy and Becca are obviously going together, no boys! They are really cool and she is coming over later to work on samples while I sketch her, mainly so she can escape her family day.”

“That’s really great sweetheart, and yes please no boys, I am not sure my mummy heart is ready for that yet!” She says while giving me a big hug. While we talked Doctor Whittaker was scribbling away in that notepad.

“Yes that’s really great isn’t it Cathy, Anna and I already started working on some short term and long term goals to have something to focus on while she is in therapy. Anna, would you like to share what your long term goals were with your parents?”

“That after school I want to go to college and university to study illustration and one day maybe be an illustrator for Disney.”

“That a brilliant goal honey, you do have a lot of talent for art, and me and your dad will 100% support you in that dream isn’t that right Steve?” She looks over to my dad for confirmation.

“University how much more will that cost?” He also gives a look as to say art isn’t a real job. I am used to ignoring that look.

“Ignore him sweetheart he is just stressed out but of course we will support you going to university if you want.”

“thanks mum, you’re the best.”I say, giving her a hug.

“Aaron, Alice, are you done drawing a picture of your family?” They both nod and hold them up. “Brilliant, can you come over and join us over here again?”

They come over and my mum joins dad back on the other sofa and Alice and Aaron sit either side of me.

“Alice, would you like to go first in showing us your picture and explaining it abit?”

“Sure, She holds up her picture, it’s a simple drawing of five stick figures, each one meaning to be us, me, mum, Alice and Aaron are inside of a house shaped box, and dad is stood on the outside with something in his hand. “so this is mum, Anna, me and Aaron and of course our guinea pigs Luna and Moana.”

Doctor Whittaker points to the drawing of dad and asks who that is. Alice responds by saying it is dad, on his phone. Doctor Whittaker then asks why is he outside and not inside with the rest of us?

Alice shrugs and says “I don’t know, maybe because he is never around and it’s like he never wants to spend time with us.”

Doctor Whittaker jots some things down in her notepad, and dad is looking shocked at how outspoken Alice is as normally she is very quiet.

“Very good Alice, now how about your drawing Aaron?”  He places the drawing on my lap and nudges me as if to say he is too nervous too talk and wants me to. I whisper it’s okay, you can tell us what your drawing is.

“well.. this is me, Alice and Anna watching movies upstairs in the den.” He points to too pink coloured stick figures and one blue stick figure sticking in front of a square, which I’m guessing is the tv.  And in the triangle of the house shape which means the attic. He then points to two taller stick figures in the down stairs area, with lines coming from around their heads but he doesn’t say what this is so I prompt him as I am pretty sure.

“Is that mum and dad downstairs?” He nods, “And these lines angry lines, because they are arguing?” He nods again and mum wipes a tear from her eye as if I didn’t notice. Doctor Whittaker scribbles away in her notebook which makes me wish I could know what she is writing and examining about our family.

After scribbling away for a few minutes she adjusts her position and places her notepad on the table, “I think this has been a really good first session and we have made a lot of progress and given  me some good ideas about where to go from here in future sessions. It was really lovely meeting you Mr and Mrs Wilson, Alice and Aaron.” She says as she stands up.

“yes it was lovely to meet you too Doctor Whittaker and feeling much more relaxed now I know Anna is in your cable hands.” She says as she stands up and shakes her hand. “Come kids lets go,say bye to Doctor Whittaker.” Alice says bye as she walks out and Aaron just waves with one hand and the other is firmly attached to mine.

We all head out and head towards the reception area, mum and dad walking silently behind us while Aaron is still firmly gripping my left hand and Alice is walking by my right side. As we get to the reception area I ask them what their plans for the rest of the day are.

“Well dad is meeting a friend to watch a football game, Aaron I am going to drop you at James’ house and you two can have a playdate, Alice your going to Hannah’s house as you have some prep to do for your first sleepover tonight and in the meantime I need to go to the café and do inventory.”

Aaron is very excited; he loves going to his best friend’s house, and Alice is very excited but abit nervous for her first sleepover at her best friend’s house. “Hey don’t worry about tonight okay, it will be great, you will have so much fun, and if you need any entertainment ideas just text me, as me, Izzy and Becca have had some insanely epic sleepovers!” This cheers her up abit and I give her a tight hug.  I tell Aaron to have lots of fun but don’t eat too much sugar at his friend’s house and follow that with a very tight hug. I tell my dad I hope he has a good time with his friend, and he doesn’t reply or try to hug me so I ignore him as normal. I give my mum a tight hug and thank her for being so good in therapy and saying all the right things. After a few more hugs between me, mum, Alice and Aaron they head out the doors as as I see them vanish down corridors I grab my phone and text Izzy that therapy is done and she can come whenever she wants. I head back to my room as I need a few minutes to decompress and freshen up. I pass the isolation unit and that girl Beth is still screaming but it doesn’t freak me out as much. I get a response from Izzy “Awesome we just finished in the museum and it wasn’t that bad but definitely done enough family fun, I will head home and grab my sewing stuff and see you in about ½ hour.” Perfect I think as that gives me half an hour of rest time to gather myself after therapy. I reach my room, unlock my door, and go to the bathroom and wash my hands,face and then spray some deodorant so I feel fresher. And head over to my bed and click my laptop on and play some Netflix in the background while I text Izzy that I am in my room when she gets here and also to check in with Becca to see how her weekend is going, she replies that other than being exhausted from no sleep due to her little sister she it is amazing, she and Mandy are so excited for their dad coming home on Monday. Before I know it Izzy is here and crushing me with an enormous hug.

—TO BE CONTINUED—